IN MEMORIAM. 1/4/23 - 19/4/23

yesterday, a true tragedy occurred. a 3D animated gif of a grave, labelled R.I.P. flowers surround it.

my tamagotchi, Gupson St Mattias Bartholomew III Montgomery has passed.

i will now regale you, with the tale of my beautiful baby boy

day 1

now, let me tell you. i have wanted my own tamy gotcher for a while. i used to look at amazon listings wistfully, dreaming of the day i could own my owwn tamer gonchi a photgraph of me holding my tamagotchi, the screen displaying an egg

but you know what. i dont have self control. i spent that money. you know how im a twitch streamer? my first payout. all went to the tamergonhy. your moeny. your donations your contributions. all to my boyd

april 1st, my baby arrives. and oh. he was so beautiful... so pretty .

now u may be saying, "erm! thats a egg" SHUT UP!! SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! SHUT UP!! NOW DO IT !!! SHUT THE HELL UP

i mean, hahaha yea temygonnys start out as small lil eggys,. They will hatch soon...... in like..... 5 minutes .

ohgh whats that!! he he he he he he h eh eh eh e HATCHED!! !

blobby lil boy! so prety ! ooo my boyyy a photograph of the tamagotchi, the egg replaced with a blob-like creature.

at this point, i havent concocted a proper name for this guy!, but i still loved him all the same. he beeped, i fed him hamburger. he beeped? i played a stupid fucking number guessing game where i had to guess a higher or lower number

it was like love at first sight . i loved my bab. i was now a parent at 17 solid years old. im a teen father.

All he do is just squirm and sludge around and also poops oh he poops ALOT l;ike oh my god , Jesus . what a freak.

but he was My Freak <3

yaawn,,,, however. being a father us hard work, who would have thunk it,. so i decided to rest my pretty head on my pillow and take my first sleep... some real honk shoo stuff . some real ahh mimimi aaahh mimimi stuff ya know.

day 2

ok so i have something to confess.. I lied to you. the second image seen on this page is actually the 1st evolution a tooby goncher. that stage was what i was met with when i woken up. that stuff was insane . i was like . :O . it was insane.

at this stage, i had gotten used to taking care of this goober, feed, play . clean . wait . repeat. this parentin g stuff is actually really easy dont know why my parents suck at it

that last sentence was a joke. i love my parents. they are cool and i think they could do a kickflip if they tried hard enough

also! turns out tomo grangos can just make noise. for like no reason. absolutely none. just for the hell of it. however luckily it gave me the option to scream at it and instil it with a deep seeded fear of acting out of line . God i LOve my Son g : - O

yawn,, But againm. i havent found out the secret to living without sleeping (yet.. lets just say i got a hypothesis involving about 10 litres of Hard Drugs) so i again , i went to sleep

but as i rest my pretty little head on my pillow, a nagging feeling started to eat away at me, this thomas gonker had no bed!!! it was simply just resting on the hard Wood of my table. i HAVE to do something about this

a photograph of the tamagotchi, now tucked into the folds of a tissue

in my infinite wisdom, i had fashioned a bed with a tissue. beayotfiul.

honestly i stopped keeping track of time

HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LEGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i gottsa be honest, i scrumpt the loudest scream ever, my boy could walk! he was dancing around on the screen! look at him go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! waahoooo!!!

at this moment , i knew what i had to do, i had to name him. some people had some (bad) ideas . but i had one name in mind, or in fact,,, multiple

Gupson St. Mattias Bartholomew III Montgomery

it was perfect! that was my boy! Gupson St Mattias Bartholomew III Montgomery! a regal name for a boy that was deserving for treatment like a king !!!

but,, yaawnnmm,,,,,,, biys gotta sleep again... gotsa. gottsa go into my goo filled stasis chamber,,,

the next day

HOLY SHITT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AGAIN!!!!!!!

ARMS!!!!!!

now if ur not a tomgy expert, u may not undertstand the relevance of this rat like forme, But this is a Mametchi, a form of tablet gnnoci that evolves with good discipline and 0 care mistakes........... He Loafed me 🥺🥺

Now this was the last stage that he could evolve into, , for the rest of his days he just danced about and eventually screeched at me for me to stuff another Hamned Burger down his gullet

The reckoning.

it was a april day. the days were transitioning into a pleasent, spring heat. the clouds would part, revealing the radiant sun beaming upon me.

school had started at this point, and were ramping up to my final exams, i had to leave my boy at home (however pausing him to prevent him starving)

i came back home. he was fine. dancing even. i started with my studies. 5 minutes later i had remembered to check on my boy, but i was met with

a photograph of the tamagotchi, now displaying a image of a UFO and stars, signifying the death of Gupson St Mattias Bartholomew III Montgomery

he had died. he joined the stars, shining brighter than any of them.

at the age of 20 days, he lived a fulfilled life. full of number games and Haming Bubger.

amongst the cosmos, i look up at the night sky . comforted by the knowledge that he's watching over me, in a better place.

Rest In Peace, Gupson St Mattias Bartholomew III Montgomery.